I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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