Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
how does that bad decision feel?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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