Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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