I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
