Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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