Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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