dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
