we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
