As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
