why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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