awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
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