Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
