So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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