handjob tips. give me some.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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