i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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