I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
