I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
