I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
