Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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