you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
