question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
