Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
as a side note pls kill me
I smell like Dick and happiness
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
