pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize