She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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