Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
