playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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