Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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