I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
