I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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