I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
