Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
