Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize
