the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
