god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
