Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
