seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Randomize
