i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I have tasted many bathrooms
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
