when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
