Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
