Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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