No awkward lesbian experiences without me
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement 😭😂
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