forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
