what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
