Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
The air was thick with penises
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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