Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
