Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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