he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
