My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
