i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
