Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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